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Column Colors, Row Numbers

I’m just going to leave this here.


Hello! Welcome to this week’s post. I’ve just come from my coronation and I’ve got a lot to cover. Get comfortable.

It was my night to pick, so of course that sorry son of a bitch Steve bailed. Always on my night! No matter. I’d been wanting to play some abstract games for a while, and they all play well with three. It was fine.


I don’t usually enjoy abstracts, but I very much enjoy all three of these. Maybe because they don’t really feel very abstracty? Two of the three actually have a bit of theme to them. But abstracts they are, and like them I do.

First up, Azul. A tile-laying game about laying tiles. So cheeky. I LOVE this game. I’m not good at it. But I love the tiles and the colors and the bag and puzzle and the little stations....I love it all.


I could go for some Jolly Rancher fruit chews right about now.

Workman and Leon had never played, so I fumbled through a rules explanation. It’s really not complicated, but the scoring is kind of wonky. They picked it up easily enough though.

They also picked up the whole “stick the last player with a bunch of tiles they can’t place” mechanic. On round two or three, I took a bath on red tiles. I exceeded the limit of my floor. Cost me 14 points.


Red, the blood of angry men. Also the new color of my floor.

I thought Workman had the game won. All three scores were close, but he had verticals and I had none. And both he and Leon could end the game at any time. But I had a monster last round. Not only did I get a vertical, I got TWO 5-tile bonuses. Two! That was 20 points, more than making up for the red tile debacle. I ended up winning with 80. Workman was next with 61 and Leon had 50.


The little backsplash that could.

Next up was NMBR 9, a game I should hate but oddly I enjoy. I SUCK at spatial games. They hurt me to play. But for some reason, I enjoy this game. And I do better than I would expect me to. Just not tonight, unfortunately.


The title characters.

I tried to establish a solid base. And I did. But I established little else. Late game, I was still adding numbers to level zero and I feel like that’s bad? My final build was not impressive. I scored 63 points. Leon had 68, and Workman had 91. He was rather proud of himself. Spoiler alert: it didn’t last.


The most multi-player solitaire of all the multi-player solitaire games.

The last game on my abstract must-play list was Sagrada. I love this game too. I find it oddly relaxing. But it stresses Workman the hell out. Like, in the extreme. He can be a little AP at times, but he gets major AP with Sagrada. Although, to be fair, “My turns wouldn’t take any time at all if you people would quit f***ing me!”

I actually do pretty well at this game. I don’t think I’ve ever had a misplayed die. Until tonight. I looked down at my beatiful window (while waiting on Workman to make a freaking decision already) and realized I had two twos right next to each other. Oh, the humanity! I may never recover. I removed one of the dice and most of my pride and my dreams of victory. Leon won with 55, I was second with 48 and Workman had 31. He was broken.

So broken, he made us play again. Oh dear god.

In the first game, our bonuses included different colors in rows and different numbers in columns. But in this game, we somehow drew the opposite. We needed different colors in columns and different numbers in rows. This completely derailed Workman. Every turn, he muttered “Column colors, row numbers. Column colors, row numbers.” That and “Dammit Leon!” He was wrecked.


Column colors, row numbers, dammit Leon.

Apparently, Leon needs to get into the stained glass window business because he won this game as well. He managed to get 64 to Workman’s hard-fought 60. And I had 48 again. Go figure.


My 48-point game two window. Lovely, despite being a loser. Also glare.

After all that abstraction, we were were ready for something less taxing. We opted for Biblios, one of my all-time favorite three-player games. It was fairly uneventful (Workman did blow a gasket in the very first round over some bad green card placements and Leon started gifting his own hand and not the deck at one point, but other than that, it was uneventful.) Workman won. So we played again, and I won.


In all my plays of Biblios, how have I never noticed this lunatic?

If you’re keeping score, we had each won two games. It was time for a tie-breaker. A war to settle the score. A brawl to end it all. Or maybe just a game of Love Letter.

I started strong. I had two awesome back-to-back barons against Leon where only one card could beat him. And I had that card. Both times. So sweet. Workman mostly just had the handmaid and I mostly just guarded him and guessed handmaid. So sweet. I ended up staying strong and won. Boo-yah indeed.

And thus I was declared queen of game night. Heavy is the head that wears the crown.

Also, it was a really fun night. I enjoy playing a lot of little games every now and then. Especially when I win most of them.

Are you still here? That was a long one. That’s what she said. But thanks for reading to the end! Happy gaming!